As you probably know, child adoption has been my life’s work for the past three or more decades. Recently, I was invited to submit a chapter for the anthology RELATIVE STRANGERS: Inheritance, Identity, and the Meaning of Kinship, edited by B.K. Jackson, titled “Coming Home.” Written in 2nd person, the essay detailed what it was like to truly meet my family for the first time, the tension, the hope, the hesitation, the difficulties each of us face as we came together.
First, I enjoyed writing in 2nd person. I think it allows you, the reader, a chance to see things from my point of view, as “I” become “you.” Second, it pushes back against the typical reunion narrative that we will recognize one another, recognize our relatedness, run into each others arms, laughing and crying, and a happy-ever-after ending. There’s too much shame, too much baggage, too many years, for that to be the outcome; it is an event not free from potholes, some severe.
I am one of 28 contributors who write openly, honestly, and poignantly, about how family secrets affect us, whether we are the product of an affair, a product of donor conception, or a product of child placement, among other reasons we don’t know our genetic relatives. We inhabit the room where uncomfortable secrets whisper through the walls, we live in that room, we entertain in that room, we dream in that room, and at times, we dread that room.
If you are interested in purchasing the book, and feel like supporting something other than Amazon, please feel free to check out Thriftbooks (https://www.thriftbooks.com/w/relative-strangers–inheritance-identity-and-the-meaning-of-kinship_bk-jackson/59383313/?resultid=5d788212-f838-4504-9322-0f16590aff91#edition=75947722&idiq=89562896).
I will be doing talks and will have them on my calendar, please check them out.
